her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
I feel like banging her is an expected thing. But banging you would be like getting a 36 on the ACT.
He hid IN a snowbank for 2 hours waiting for me to come home. This game has to stop before someone dies.
A guy with no shirt on and a eyepatch just got out of the car beside me. After he slammed his door into mine. This is our hometown.
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
I feel I should make it clear.....I'm not stalking you, I'm stalking ur dick. You don't even need to talk when you get here. At 4am I think we'd both prefer that anyway.
So, I'm playing the Doctor Who drinking game with my dogs, but they don't understand quite when to drink. Still counts as successful, though, right?
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
Half way through sex he whispered in my ear, " your the second best I've ever had" then proceeded to tell me to sit on his face.
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
I'm taking the day off so I can get drunk at Whole Foods before noon
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
Randomize
