You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
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I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
And the cops told us we were all naked.
I may or may not have just ruined a marriage. But in my defense I got all my drinks for free tonight.
Eating a TV dinner and watching Goosebumps on Netflix, the sad, sad title of my autobiography.
You thought that you were playing full contact and started screaming "I will fucking end you! I will end you!" and tried tackling everyone in the room.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This drunk lesbian I just met keeps trying to shove sushi in my mouth. Help.
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
If you enjoy dance recitals as much as I do, that's one shitty Father's Day...
I think I almost ran over some kid I went to high school with. Guilt factor: moderate to low.
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
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