The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
why do my parents always seem to be having way more sex than i do?
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
He crawled over to me grabbed my boob asked me if I liked cats and then passed out. If that's really my RA, it's gonna be a long year
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
my balls were so many shades of blue last night I could have used them as paint and replicated the entirety of Picaso's blue period. The girl was an art major I feel like this metaphor is appropriate.
It's two in the afternoon, I'm on my third glass of wine and I'm watching Lambchop on youtube. How do you think I feel right now?
We turned a wake into a bar crawl.
I have 13 missed calls from when I slept outside on some rocks
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
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