clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
I can't even use my hands i'm so hungover
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
it wasn't until he got that douchey haircut that i started regretting sleeping with him
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
I offered the opportunity to grope my boobs for pints. Two girls took me up.
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
I got really worried when i woke up and there weren't any missed booty calls from him between 3 and 5 am. Apparently his gf is in town ...
Randomize
