Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
I just found ouut you can get a DUI in a kayak. Fuck.
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
traded hat for shot of whiskey. lovah yo life. only ADVENTURE NOW. OH GOD IT WENT TO CAPS LOCK
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
I told him I'd go cook him breakfast, but ended up passing out on the kitchen floor in the fetal position spooning the dog
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
not sure if destroying him emotionally was worth it but damn it's a fucking hilarious story
I'm sorry about the spring break comment. I won't make anymore pornos, I promise.