are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
While she was crying about breaking up, he looked at her through his fork and said "of course she's upset, she's in jail." Having sex with him tonight.
There's a man in a pair of gray footie pajamas and a paper crown watching the kids at the playground. It was easier to tell who was a pedophile before Where the Wild Things Are came out.
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
What do you expect from her? Do you remember that creepy man she dated who saturated a pillowcase in his musky cologne and mailed it to her and she still slept with him.
He left me alone in a hotel room my last night in town to go home to jerk off and watch TV. So yeah, I guess we're not really friends.
I gave you chlamydia, you gave me a concussion. Now we're even.
I don't need inspirational quotes. If I'm going to be motivated, it will be by anger and spite.
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
I was too hungover to sit up and pull the curtains closed so I did it with my toes
I'm sorry you had to knock him out on your birthday. But that also means I won the bet that you'd hit someone so you owe me 40. dollars
I’m sorry my lady boner messed up your mojo!!
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