So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
she thought don quixote was a type of tequila.
two words: eviction party
I woke up with a flask of whiskey and a mason jar full of sausage in my tux jacket. south georgia is where i belong
Look, all I'm sayin is $2 boilermakers and an expense account are probably a bad mix…
We agreed to not shave eyebrows when someone is passed out. douchebag.
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
This is all my moms fault. She shouldn't have encouraged my weird fascinations as a child
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
Once upon a time I threw up in my own hands last night.
Wait you took his virginity AND broke his bed doing it
I know! I’m the best!
Randomize
