no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
I heard a loud ass thump and then I saw both dogs coming around the corner.... Without him. I went to check out what happened and the dogs apparently pulled him down onto his face, knocking him out.
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
Just got a message from a guy on a dating site who says he helped me remove lime pulp from my eye in a club toilet 2 weeks ago.
He insisted on us having sex while watching the biggest loser and asked me if I could "resist the temptation".
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
Running into your random closeted hookup from last night is really awkward when you have to sit next to him and his girlfriend in a 200 person class.
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
I think I just wrote a poem about your penis but it was totally unintentional.
You were walking away to pee and as you were undoing your belt you looked at me and said "the belt is off. the game is on. Remever that."
We were in his kitchen and she turned to me with a straight face and an avocado in her hand and said "Can we steal this?"
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
You're wearing pigtails and giving away our kitchen appliances. Clearly, you're drunk.
Randomize
