yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
Instead of having sex, we spent the entire night making pillow forts and have sword fights. I think I'm in love
you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I can't get a one-legged man to love me, what the hell chance do I have with a NORMAL guy???
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
If you are drunk already, then as your friend I am advising you to stop writing on your dads Facebook wall
A guy at one of our big accounts just said you probably dont remember meeting me saturday night ps you were right about those two girls being lesbian
Hey remember that night when you sang Fergie to me? I think that's the exact moment in time when the thought "I could be faithful to this man" came into serious consideration.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
Friends don't let friends put redi whip in their wine
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
Realization: many of my behaviors would lead to me being stoned to death in a lot of foreign countries. God bless America.
Randomize