if you don't start talking to me i'm gonna tell your gf that you said she tastes bad
Do you have a shampoo for semen
Or a time machine
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
My 40 year old neighbors are throwing a party for their eight year old niece's birthday. It's 1am and they're still partying hard. Harder than me. It's Saturday. Just say it, I'm a disgrace to the generation.
Dude, she introduced me to her best friend form Russia and she was a 10. Her other Russian friend was even hotter. How did communism fail?
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
I found a video of myself completely naked on my phone giving a drunk tutorial on how to shit properly while blindfolded. Did you record it?
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
wtf guys I thought we agreed on no more knives. So much for not destroying the house
My mother just set me up with the son of the man I fucked last weekend. I could crawl under a rock and die OR I could remember the rules of genetics and hope that JR takes after daddy. Wish me luck...
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