If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
Why do guys in porn never have boxers on?
better question: why do you always text me when you're watching porn
My mom's mothers day present consisted of a card, chocolate and the rose bush I threw up in as I was getting in last night. She loved it.
There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
He has a really nice penis but its like a model that wasn't built to scale
They're showing aladdin at the bar my birthday is complete
Because at some point last night we decided that shotgunning beers from a paint stick was a good idea
HOLY FUCK COMFIEST CHAIR EVER
how did you know i stayed over last night?
there was a trail of glow sticks and cheetos from the front door all the way to his bedroom
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
You don't understand. My ass is the color of eggplant.
Godammit I caught my hair on fire taking a bong rip
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
Will you PLEASE get your mom to stop telling me I'd make a great husband? She knows I'm gay, right?!
I know, but she really likes you. Have you met my brother yet?
Randomize
