Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.
she was pretty happy for someone in the middle of a herpes outbreak, how was i supposed to know?
Just found out my ex boss was running a whore house in the bar. Time to remove her as a reference?
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
I want to have sex with Will Smith. I guess I have a thing with 90s sitcom stars. Stamos, Joey Lawrence, John Goodman.
I am all the way hung over and want nothing more in this world than a McMuffin. Happy day after Thanksgiving.
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
Randomize
