hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
She swung at the pinata with crutches
Please stop leaving drunk voicemails with your new black/Irish accent.
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
I have made the descision to sacrifice the first of my family's dogs that wakes me before noon tomorrow. I may quickly become the family outcast
What am I doing with my life
Sleeping with dudes who have peacocks apparently.
His ex-girlfriend just gave his current girlfriend the heimlach omg omg omg help this is so awkward
Bar selfie Saturday turned into bar nudie Saturday in a hurry. I need to delete my snapchat...
She's eating hot cheetos out of the bag with chopsticks, Matt, how is she NOT my soulmate?
I feel like hooking up with you on my floor, sneaking out my window and jumping a fence is an effort that deserves a happy birthday.
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
soo... how was my night?
Randomize