I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
He pulled a condom out of his satchel and i questioned my entire life.
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.
I'm just going to eat my milkshake, watch teen wolf, masturbate, and lament my inability to form meaningful relations with men who aren't gay
My manager said you offered to make out with him to ensure I keep my job if I didn't show up to work today
Like did I tell you about the ex Amish guy? Because that was a mess
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
I woke up on the floor with 2 cartons of cigarettes, a box of chocolate bars, and a business card for a man named Larry. Don't remember him, but if the Rols on his card is his, I might throw him a mouth party...
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
He asked the waiter, at 6:40 am, drunk, if they served alcohol. After he said no, he's like 'well, I guess we can eat then.'
Randomize
