Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
I threw up under water while wearing a hockey helmet last night. Awesome.
I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
After me and my boyfriend broke up I had to resist the temptation to send a mass text to my booty calls saying "thank you for your patience. it will be rewarded."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How is it that lesbians won't hit on me at a gay club, but they'll hit on me every time I go to Walmart?
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
On my way home I stopped at target and bought beer and galoshes. I am a planner.
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
It's not even 8 pm, or Saint Patrick's Day, and Kevin is drunk on my roof humping the air
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
She's not answering my calls
Well it sounds like you really fucked up
WHO HOLDS A GRUDGE OVER MEMES
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