If a fat man falls in the shower and nobody is in the apartment, does his pride still hurt? Answer: yes
It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
this isnt the person you just texted but i have her phone. she disappeared when the bacon came home and she hasn't returned since.
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
I woke up with a fake mustache stuck to my chest and I can't even hold down water.
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
I feel like I've asked you "are you okay?" one too many times in the last 48 hours. You're hopeless.
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
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