don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
things that need to be invented #43: vodka that also acts as birth control.
Just did a shot to pluto being a planet again. I love science.
Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
What can I say? I like my food like I like my women, not entirely fucked by our contemporary world.
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
You know its going to be a good day when you have to brush your teeth out of a cup in your room using the vodka and water mixture in your fridge because you're locked out of your restroom
you made a mix containing mostly whiskey. then you took a sip, gagged and yelled "perfect!"
Observations from Vegas: #1. Strippers pasties pose a choking hazard. #2. Best. Heimlich. Ever.
My New Years resolution is actually to be MORE petty
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
I'm laying backwards. On the stairs. Eating carrots. And drinking from a captain Morgan bottle.
Randomize
