Grow some girl-balls and come out already
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
decided to have an easter egg hunt this year. the golden egg has weed in it and all the others have shots of vodka. who said we were too old for easter?!?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just realized that he was my first random hookup that didnt cause a massive breakup or divorce. Im starting to grow up
I think my vagina was keeping me fat all these years out of self preservation. It's like she knew what would happen if I lost the weight.
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
Yes I have a handle on life. A handle of Svedka.
you can't tell me not to come to work cause roads are bad then ask me an hour later to come in and expect me to be sober
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
We can't go out this weekend. My uterus is so desperate it's given me permanent beer goggles
You don't know being judged until its 7:30 in the morning and you're on 2 hours of sleep halfway between drunk and hungover wearing pajama pants at an international airport while saying how proud you are that you found the airport's bar immediately and how disappointed you are that it's closed
Why is there a trampoline for sale in my front yard?
I want to shoot him sideways (so he can still breathe) in the Adam's apple with my little crossbow.
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