Did you call me this morning? I was really drugged up and don't remember.
Have a good day. My vagina shrank.
just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
my mom found me this morning spread out like jesus sleeping on the living room floor. i had a piece of bread over my eyes to block the light out
Her husband keeps getting drunk and making out with me. Good news is I found the strep carrier. Bad news is have strep again.
Just found a partially digested mushroom under my bed. Thanks for that.
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
I made her orgasm until she cried. Four years of only having sex with dudes and I've still got it.
I got laughed at by a homeless guy in a Daniel Boone hat. I have no clue what this means for my day
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
How was the party last night?
I'm dangerously close to shitting myself.
well i maturbated this morning, which means the best part of my day has already happened.
After a beer I realize now I may have shared too much about my obsession with ghosts with my therapist this morning.
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
Randomize
