I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
Ok I can't be your drugdealer AND booty call AND friend. It just doesn't work that way
he got mad when I told him his flaccid penis looked like a sleeping kitten
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
FYI If I die in my sleep it is because I drank a bottle of coke from 1986. I needed a mixer
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
Am I over stepping my bounds if I ask to fuck in your new bathroom?
It has heated floors
In the future, could you not call me 'bro' while we're having sex?
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
My whole house smells like Spaghetti-Os and cat litter. I think I've failed as an adult.
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
The comfort of this onesie is keeping me single
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
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