Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
Sorry if I ruined your sex last night with my constant text updates about the plot of Bolt.
Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
Lying on this bed is like lying on love and marshmallows and joy
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
That works. I won't care. I'll be a mermaid. Mermaids don't give a fuck.
Especially drunk mermaids.
The next time you fuck up, your grandma sees your dick pics
AND WHAT FELONIES DID I MISS OUT ON WHILE SLUMBERING!?
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.
The drive thru lady at McDonald's asked how I was and I responded by opening the car door and throwing up all over the drive thru lane. Happy Sunday.
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
look, bitch. one day when everyone i care about deserts me for my severe moral depravity, you're going to be the only one i have.
i can't wait.
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
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