Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(617): View more from Massachusetts

I just found out I have a small penis.

(781): View more from Massachusetts

Couldn't you tell by how you've NEVER had a girlfriend?

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(571): View more from Virginia

On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like

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(813): View more from Florida

So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3

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(504): View more from Louisiana

they came at us with fireworks while we were skinny dipping in her jacuzzi at 4 am...

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The 21 Worst Ways People Have Been Dumped
Read it at the TFLN blog
(562): View more from California

I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.

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(519): View more from Ontario

My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.

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(715): View more from Wisconsin

His pick up line was "your one sexy pumpkin, I'd love to carve." Why would you let me go home with him?

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(253): View more from Washington

Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?

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(252): View more from North Carolina

I feel like a weird modern Betty Crocker. I'm icing a cake and looking at gay porn, if that's not an accurate portrayal of the 21st century idk what is.

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