I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
What should our trivia night team be named?
You peed in the parking lot while a car was was waiting behind us. And when people walked by you proceeded to say "careful you might slip"
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
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Oh you don't have to buy a shower curtain, I stole the one from her bathroom. It has dolphins on it.
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
Today is the day I die from a hangover. I love you, mom. Farewell.
I realize designer coke was a douchey thing to say but the point of the story is I did bath salts
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
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I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
He showed up to a booty call with 2 tea bags, but no condom...
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
We walking to the game and some random guy came up to to me and yelled "hey you're the whiskey guy!" And then high fived me then walked away
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
I made out with 4 out of 4 girls I was out with last night, I'm pretty sure everyone knows I'm a lesbian by now