You'll put your fingers inside me but you won't be my FB friend?
You just left with that feminine looking guy you kept calling "Jessica." Just giving the heads up.
He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
my sisters under your porch take her home
I've spent too much of my life staring at my bberry and counting to 5 to see if it blinks
I just used my med student white coat as ID to buy beer at 9 in the morning
I can't decide if the sex was so good I couldn't move, or if it was me being loaded on all the morphine that they shot me up with at the ER.
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
Just lectured your brother about using condoms when hooking up with girls he meets online. I should be a fucking life coach
WHY DO I KEEP FINDING CHICKEN THROUGHOUT THE HOUSE? GET YOUR ASS HOME NOW!
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
Well, I woke up on a roll-away, with a knot in the back of my head and penis confetti stuck to me. Also, I apparently literally gave the shirt off my back right before I passed out, so I was topless. Vegas won this trip.
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
Randomize
