Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
He gave me an orgasm before we even reached 2nd base, everything he did in high school is irrelevant.
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
I feel like the devil slapped me in the face with his dick.
Birthday success
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
All i really wanna do tonight is get drunk with you and dance on tables. is that too much to ask?
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
I just don't fit in here. The other wives are ten years older and have kids!
Well, you chose trophy wife of a 35 year old over college. Sit in your suburban soup and stew.
what compelled you to fill her bra with pudding and freeze it in the first place?
i might remember if i didn't get knocked out with it later that day.
You got into an extremely loud argument with a juggalo and slapped him, he started crying and everyone cheered.
I remember that, it happened before I started drinking. I thought you said I did something shameful?
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
I ate at the cafeteria for the first time yesterday and today I think I had an hour long fart.
Randomize
