could you grab mr moo while you're at his apt?
you brought your stuffed animal to a booty call?
I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
i just ate two sandwiches and am debating booty calling my landlord
We made a percocet pizza. And then i made an unfortunate decision.
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad.
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
You were discovered in a bush, smoking, and singing "in the jungle" to yourself. Which explains the scratches, but not the orange paint.
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
It was all good until his cat started licking my nipple along with him
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
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