he thought i was a dude.
i guess you could say your face is two degrees of separation from my balls
Not just anyone can homewreck on three continents simultaneously
you are my hero
and that's how I found out my dad doesn't believe in towels... holiday magic.
You should have seen her outfit yesterday. It was like pretty woman before Richard Gere gave her money to buy a new outfit.
woke up to an overdrawn credit card. did you order the dawsons creek boxset last night?
i hope so.
I feel I should make it clear.....I'm not stalking you, I'm stalking ur dick. You don't even need to talk when you get here. At 4am I think we'd both prefer that anyway.
I feel like it'll be a success as long as she doesn't end up dead in a ditch. There has to be a line somewhere.
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
I got sucker punched while I was making out with some girl...I think my molar might have flown into her mouth
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
Is there any chance of you maybe wanting a bouncy house at your wedding. Like maybe a .0001 chance. If so I would totally chip in for that.
Randomize
