Dude you should see the looks were getting for ordering a pitcher of beer with breakfast.
we woke up to him feeding us cheetos at 3am. and by feeding i mean shoving them in our mouths and saying "i mean who doesn't like cheetos"
The polish Muslims are throwin paczkis into the crowd and I'm beer 6 before 11 am
I let a naked juice spill down my leg for like 30 minutes bc i thought i was hallucinating that my leg was cold.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
Who knew there were so many rules and judgements about laying on a kitchen floor. I'm all like I'm resting. It just happens to be on a kitchen floor.
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
Mate, you pissed in my bed. Then told me to "Just keep swimming"
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude. Woke up this morning wearing that chick's panties. 8/10, would recommend. I love tequila.
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
I'm on the Coaster ride of shame, currently sitting across two nice old ladies smelling like condoms.
that was the most beautifully crafted sentence ive ever read that involved the phrase "genitals or whatever"
That's brilliant but could get us arrested. Give me shots until I shout LET'S DO THIS
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
Randomize