Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
martini and pecan pie.. breakfast of champions.
I'll tell these girls I'm like the pet adoption center...don't play with it if you're not taking it home.
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
Just promise me you wont die... or hook up with an old asian lady playing slots
Cant promise that last part. I won't die though
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
I STILL HAVE A HARD TIME DECIDING WHAT TO WEAR IN THE MORNING HOW WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO PICK A PAIR OF PANTS AND GO OH ILL JUST WEAR THESE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
Hold on I'll be right there, I can't find my arm.
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
Is it a bad thing when vodka doesn't taste like vodka anymore?
Randomize
