Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
I just realized i masturbated to the home shopping network. I either need to get a boyfriend asap, or a subscription to a porn website, or i just need to stop taking ambien
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
Been in the ER for 3 hours now. This hospitals transition to paperless is not going well. But my doctor looks like Elton John and just gave me percocet
3 things I learned last night: 1.) I'm not as light as I used to be. 2.) Sex on the roof of a convertible is a really bad idea. 3.) The hospital now has super glue pens for sealing minor cuts instead of stitches!
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
I'm so lazy and tired i just want to cry and fall asleep in a bed of egg mcmuffins.
He called me skinny, I broke his garbage disposal, then denied him sex. Normal second date etiquette.
Ended up in his bed... He's passed out holding me and his bulldog is laying across my legs. Both snoring. HELP!! I wanna go home!
One three hour marathon fuck session and now she's divorcing her husband. Should I get business cards made?
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
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