she said i have a nice penis, i told her only bob saget and god could judge that.
But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
Stop banging my friends. This is getting weird.
Stop being friends with hot 18 year old girls.
I let my cat eat the pepperonis off of my pizza while I was still eating it. That's the level of tequila drunk I got last night.
God I adore you.
It's like you're the one guy who got the "girls have clits" memo.
I brought ur friend Scotty home... He started rubbing my crotch then fell down and passed out in front of the microwave
I didn't pop out of a cake in a speedo with diagrams
In case that's what u were picturing
Yeah. I don't know. I'm just gonna show up at her place on valentines day with a jock strap, box of chocolates, and rose clenched between my ass cheeks with "be mine" written across my glorious man titties.
I think I'm at a stage of my life where I subconsciously purposefully fuck everything up just to see if I can find a way out of it.
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
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