used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
I just watched a trucker jack off to a picture of Ellen DeGeneres at a truck stop in Nebraska.
Every night before bed, when I used to say prayers, now I just think to myself 'freshman sluts. Soon'
how the hell did we fit 12 drunk lesbians in your car?! I felt like we were playing lesbian tetris last night.
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
I only wore my thong with cheeseburgers on it because I thought we'd have sex. So I basically wasted my best thong for nothing.
I’m pregaming Christmas shopping with grandma. What’s up?
So I had this brilliant idea that I would sleep in all sorts of sweatpants and sweatshirts... Apparently I thought I could "sweat" off the drunk in my sleep and that it would make me feel better when I woke up
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
Randomize
