I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
it feels like theres a golf ball between my legs. the sex was totally worth it tho.
Just bought a pack of cigs...gas station guy informed me i took off my underwear and tried to pop a squat by the milk last night...
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
AND FUCKING MGMT JUST CAME ON. CAN I GO DROWN MYSELF IN LESBIANS OR SOMETHING? IS IT TIME TO LESBIAN
we're fated to lesbian
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
Got stoned and went to Walmart. For some reason a preacher walked up and asked if I knew the lord so I just yelled "I CAN FEEL HIM IN MY VIENS" at the top of my lungs. he left after that.
my roommate just said she thinks she got a flashback or some memory of me getting hit by a car.
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
My only positive piece of news is that my roommate is moving home for the summer, so our stress-relief sex will be much easier to get away with.
I currently need breakfast in bed, morning sex, and a bourbon and diet coke. Make this happen
So as you were leaving, you leaned on the table too much and 3 glasses slid and fell to the floor. You then looked at me and said "To be honest, glass isnt that expensive anyways" and stumbled out of the bar.
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
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