She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
i convinced her i was a yoga teacher by showing her some warm-ups my high school track coach made up
Drunk roommate walked in on us and asked if we wanted to go eat a sandwich with her in the bathroom.
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
OMG CHARGE YOUR PHONE I NEED TO KNOW IF THIS IS A GOOD PICTURE OF MY ASS
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
Hey guys guess what I found in my bed this morning? I wish it was a man..but it was a potato
I think you'll be amused to know that I achieved the impossible feat of tripping over my own dick
He was gunna drive a half hour for a makeout sesh. Time to take the diapers off and learn about the wonders of the penis, dude
I got a hand job after work. Remember those? From the 90s...
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
My mom heard me having sex with my boyfriend but thought it was the neighbors. She commented on how quick it was. I just nodded and changed the subject
Randomize
