she was mega hot - except for the poop under her fingernails
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
I felt like a fire hydrant the vomit just kept coming out
I found her in the bathroom licking her screwdriver off the floor. she said there was no way she was wasting a $6 drink.
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
Getting business cards printed for tonight. Would you rather be: 1. Vice President of Argentina 2. Celebrity Dental Assistant or 3. Dial-Up Internet Technician
3. Dial-Up Internet Technician.
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
Also, I found this app that is basically a tamagochi from the 90's and now I finally have something to keep me busy at work!
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?
You know you're an adult when you start planning your hookup a week in advance
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
Facebook just reminded me of the time I found two IHop cheese sticks in my hand bag. Those were the days.
He brought me another shot of rum, ice and my underwear when I woke up.
What a gentleman.
I KNOW, right?!
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
Randomize
