Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
remind me not to puke in the mesh trash can tonight
they're like a gay fantastic four
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
It would be like if I said I had the cure for cancer and my explanation was I like turtles.
He challenged me to a drink off, I couldn't just say no. It was a matter of pride really.
And as he was cursing your name from the bathroom you were ordering yourself another drink on his tab. The poor bastard had no clue you were a pro drunk
You 2012 self promised me that you would do LSD with me, and it's 2015 now. So.
Plus, I'm basically a doctor, so what could go wrong.
My mom just asked me about the teeth marks on my headboard..
I just choked eating whip cream from the can, and peed a little because I was coughing so hard. How am I still single.
and then after the older sorority girl asked me his name she said "he gave me the rest of his mcdonalds and I decided to go home with him. it was the best that I could hope for my night"
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
Randomize
