There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
you broke a plate. told her her wedding china was ugly and you were doing her a favor. then proceeded to break every plate you could get your hands on.
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
He went THROUGH MY PHONE (he's 30 for God sake) then asked me why I was stringing along 12 guys... I told him he could have just asked me if I was banging other people and then saved himself from looking at pics of dicks bigger than his.
Next time I feel awkward in a situation I'm going to just yell "free bird!!!!" Like some redneck at lynyrd skynyrd show
Apparently I missed the "You may have to jack off a horse" part of the application.
I just wrote the Drag Queen from Saturday Night on FB and apologized for licking her. Weirdest thing I have ever typed...
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
Randomize
