YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
Turned in a paper today on drug abuse. Chose to write about percocet. Just realized I started 2 sentences with "This amazing drug"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You had already cockblocked me. The cops were just an assist.
She just ended a sentence with "and he doesn't even mind my herpes..."
I'm like a walking PSA for tequila shots
Before we fucked we both mutually agreed not to tweet about it.
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just went over my top ten highlight reel with that guy I'm fucking. It was like we were sports announcers. But about sex.
And then I discovered that while drunk last night I called the NAACP and left an angry voicemail demanding they fix the racism at my school
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
How I know I've been single too long: I'm reveling in finding out my taken friends are being tragically dumped
You literally snort drugs up your nose and you’re questioning the brand of the multivitamin right now?
Randomize