I just found out she jerks off to lesbian porn too honest to god
you wouldn't believe how perfect a match this is its scary
If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
Just sayin. I pissed on his couch, and ruined his stove. If he's not mad, we're partying there every weekend...
You asked me if you could throw up in my shoe.
If you don't want me in your apartment then lock your door better
True love: he brought me a margarita while was in the shower. He's a keeper.
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
Drunkenly making hamburger helper. I just whispered "I can't wait to have you in my mouth."
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
Hey when you get home, can you do me a solid and throw one of your pregnancy tests on my bed?
EPT or First Response?
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
Last time he showed up for Christmas he went on and on about backpacking somewhere and getting ghonnorreah twice.
Randomize
