Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
there was this guy running across campus barefoot in the pouring rain stepping in all the puddles. i want his life. and i want to be stripper.
She's pissed. She declared she was moving out and proceeded to pack 3 pairs of shoes, her electric wine opener and ONE sock. Then told us to have fun paying her portion of the rent.
Well the weddings in 4 days so I already got the eightball lined up and the wii fit all warmed up. Still wanna bet I wont lose 20 pounds by the wedding?
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
You told me you loved me after I brushed your teeth with my index finger.
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
Woke up in an unfamiliar pair of underwear, running shoes but no socks, and a cowboy hat. Thank you crown royal
All I want is tacobeell and your body
that's my favorite sentence you've ever said.
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
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