Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
My fucking roommate unpluged my alarm; I pissed on his clean clothes.
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
im just glad that if you were going to have awkward hospital sex, you would want it with me
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
One is full of apple juice. One is full of tequila. This is real russian roulette my friend.
I come back upstairs and there he was sitting in a speedo. He handed me a blanket and said "let's cuddle" how is this real life?
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
Opened the browser on my phone to a web search for midget birth rates per capita. A good night.
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
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