I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
Fun fact: he pulled out my nuva ring while he was fingering me.. he looked really confused at me and it a couple of times, so i just said "surprise! not only is it good for pleasure, it's also really handy for storing plastic toys." I'm thinking he's definately gonna call.
just gave a homeless man a kiss in exchange for two handles
exact location. now.
I think I would be able to remember how to smoke but I can't seem to remember how to breathe.
i'm glad we're now at the level of friendship where we can comfortably discuss the quality of our shit
Hooked up with an Aussie chick last night only an Indonesian chick away from completing my lap around the pacific rim
he was wearing ninja turtle pajamas and he STILL got laid. who the fuck is this guy?!
While looking for an apartment, I've realized that the way I rate balconies is on the "how easy would it be to smoke weed here" scale.
What other scale is there?
You would be my first round pick for a drinking team
Seriously, don't even. "Hi, have I seen you half naked covered in bright red body paint on the internet?" is NOT acceptable water-cooler chit-chat.
Aw.
I'm so confused as to where the sexual euphemisms end and the drinking starts
I'm alittle affraid you might be dead, seeing how your work party is in an hour and you haven't answered me? I mean I'm picturing you 1. Passed out in your car covered in fries or 2. On a boat in a box to Mexico covered in coke. Please let it be number 1. And aren't we going to your work party?
i can't even hate his new girlfriend cuz she survived a fucking brain tumor. like that's just not fair.
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
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