2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
You want looks pregnant, is pregnant, or the one with a kid.
While I'm in the bathroom taking a piss you think of a way to get us the hell out of here.
I told him I had my daily dose of vitamin c so i wouldn't blow him
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
You know, it's scary to think that someday I might buy a pregnancy test with pride, not at 2am...
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
I sent him a pic of my tits.. All he said was, "oh your sun burn"
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
random memory from the wedding, the bartender show us how to open the windows of the hotel and pee out of them
I'm just saying, no one has ever made me laugh or cum as hard as you do. Sometimes at the same time which I didn't know was possible. Is there even a word for that besides love?
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
Randomize
