The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
Yo, my girl thinks she's pregnant, so I've got a DD for the wedding. Sweet.
We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
i may or may not have just grinded on your dog thinking it was my boyfriend
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
You know where a good place to spend summer is? In your head. High as shit. It doesn't matter where you are.
That feels better than graduating college or that time I tried to ride a llama. Did you know they really spit?
That awkward moment when your boyfriend tries to have sex with his go pro on #hdporn
She sent me nudes via email. What the fuck are we still in the 90s? Grow up
One of the worst parts about living at my parents again is trying to hide how often I'm hungover, just quietly puked in the basement bathroom while my mom got ready for work
We need to stop smoking. I just ran into a glass door.
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
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