Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
Pitchers of shots should be outlawed. I've puked more than i've breathed in the past half hour.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
Update: I only have one shoe. The other one now belongs to the gods of jello-wrestling. May it rest in peace.
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
My addiction to golf is getting out of hand....I just caught myself swinging my dick like a putter while peeing.
You kept saying you we're gonna puke and wanted to steal my pants
That does not explain the remnants of a small fire in my bathtub.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You motherfucker. I just had an MRI with a penny under my boob.
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
Waiting on the notification from my fitness pal that tells me I'm an alcoholic
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
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