no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
Why do guys in porn never have boxers on?
better question: why do you always text me when you're watching porn
Hindsight: maybe I should have included a few transitional texts in between talking about your son and my need to have sex. Do over?
I'm watching the red sox through my neighbors window from my bathroom. We're winning btw.
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
Dude i was hungover i didnt know she was in the shower, she screamed i screamed we all screamed and i just so happend to piss in the shower.
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
I'm with the hottest fuckin fire fighter right now. I'm ready to fake my own death.
Owwwww. Yeah. I can barely move unless Im high on vicodin. We are bad at drinking/balancing. We will be the first to break hips and have to go into a home.
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
Is it weird that I'm smoking a cig on my back patio in a sports bra and underwear?
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
I woke up in nothing but my socks and my hat a cigarette in my mouth and a beer in my hand..........GREAT NEW YEARS
Randomize
