So drunk i had to piss sitting down...
so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
swear to god some girl just crawled out of the washing machine. this is intense.
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
I imagine my 13 hours of sleep after my 3 day upper bender was similar to Jesus rising from the dead.
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
There's a big bag of salt and vinegar chips and a Budweiser for when you wake up. Don't say I never did anything for you.
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
I don't think there was a moment this weekend where grey goose did not course through my veins
I remember three things: you falling down an entire flight of stairs, me stripping out of your Christmas one-sie to do cartwheels in my underwear, and people standing above me saying, "where did that bump on her head come from?"
Also, I was told I kept the antlers on the entire time. I'm deeming last night a success.
I kinda wanna eat your hands right now.
Put down the everclear and go to bed.
This is the only time in your life where finding a half eaten lime and pair of florescent pink underwear that wasn't yours means that it was a good night
Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
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