ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
We were done making out and had been asleep for a hour. I felt him put his hand on my butt. Then I farted.
Yeaaah, so cabbie laughed at me, and said, "rough nite? Let me find you some music" . apparently OPP is the appropriate ride of shame soundtrack.
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the man who designed bathrooms to have toilets within easy puking distance from the shower is my hero
That's why she's the girl with her life together and you're the girl with the penis drawn on your car.
Like I couldn't describe it to you but if they did a lineup of penises i'd be able to pick it out.
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
We legitimately thought something was wrong with you until someone pointed out you were just doing the thriller dance
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
I finished my first whiskey and I'm waiting to have a second one in celebration when your pregnancy test comes back negative
He burst in the bathroom while I was peeing to hand me my beer I was looking for earlier tht night. And my pants were already down so I thought why not
Her hot older sister walked in on us, looked me up and down, then stared straight at her and said "I call sloppy seconds on this one" then left. I'm still debating on how I feel about that.
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