I am not drunk. I will recite the pledge.
I don't want you to recite the pledge!
Pledge alligien to america to united states of america
my elementary bus driver served me drinks last night. He hooked me up
It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
We just stood on the porch wondering how you managed to puke up a whole piece of bologna
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
Absolute soulmates or functional alcoholics?
Can't be the first without the last
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
I just ate cottage cheese and went to the gym at 6 this morning...the things i'll do because I might get naked in front of a new boy
I was so drunk last night I couldn't see faces, only from the shoulders down.
she fell asleep in a torn bush after playing cards at a nursing home.
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
You wanna come over?
Too high to be booty called. My cereal is growing hair.
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
Randomize
