Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
Post-shopping-cart-scooter-jousting victory fuck?
I just had a threesome in the back of my mom's van. I'm pretty sure the rest of my week is going to be epic.
The lady at Walgreens was all excited my pregnancy tests had a coupon.
You know, I think I'm going to rock the shit out of this whole mid-twenties thing. Fuck babies and weddings -- I have vodka and young cock.
I asked him if we could switch positions so I could watch the Olympics... I'd say date number two is a miss
You're the only person not starstruck by him
Yes. That tends to happen after you regularly lick someone's balls.
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
Well yeah. Plus. My dick looks awful. So I would need to do some extreme makeover dick edition before even starting something so ridiculous.
I feel like my liver should be on crutches right now
Randomize
