No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
i climbed out of the bath tub this morning and found him taped to the treadmill
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
Debating whether the Plan B I had this morning would go under breakfast or lunch in my food log.
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
I tried to have a quickie with him at the company happy hour. I think I need to quit my job.
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
This is a crisis. I had a huge crush on him in seventh grade and now his girlfriend is due to have his child on my birthday. HIS CHILD CAN'T BE BORN ON MY BIRTHDAY.
No, he came home, unscrewed all of the lightbulbs, and threw them in the sink.
Randomize
